My birthday celebrations and healing odyssey are coming to a close.  Today I head back to Vancouver.  I finished my incredible visit last night playing a few of my songs at an open mic, my nervousness comfortably beside me, my heart on my sleeve, my sister and mother there to cheer me on.

Just like it was last fall, it's very hard for me to leave Nelson-The Shire-I'm so comfortably at home here.  There is so much here that feeds my soul.  My sixteen days here have felt like two months.  And it doesn't help that the last three days have been warm and sunny.  When I think about all the blessings I've received since arriving back in the Kootenays, I think I must be slightly mad to leave.  Sometimes an important part of growth is leaving the comforts behind.

During my visit here I took part in a sweat lodge ceremony, a family constellation workshop, and I had two hugely supportive sessions with two mentors that I love.  I sat in on a men's group that graciously keeps a spot for me.  I took part in my first poetry slam (in which I found myself in my first haiku-off).  I saw What About Me--the follow-up to One Giant Leap-which included a question and answer session via Skype with the director.  I went to a racy and hilarious Kootenay-style Cabaret.  I feasted at two potlucks, both put together for my birthday-one in Kaslo, one in Nelson.  I went to a presentation on Haiti by a friend of mine who had volunteered there after the earth quake.  I had so much fun and meaningful connection with my sister and mother and friends.   I had a wildly fun time dancing with the Nelson JusDance group.    And the list goes on: trampoline bum war with Raven, 4-layer chocolate cake with raspberry filling and chocolate-mouse icing made by Raven and his mother, another chocolate cake with cherry sauce and whipping cream made by Annie in Kalso, pizza from the Kootenay Bakery, dinner with the Harvey's, a hike up to Pulpit Rock, a run in the sun on the old railway path,  two scrabble games with my sister and mother in which three times I made seven-letter words!, road hockey in Kaslo in which a canoe paddle, two different brooms, and a bent piece of wood were used as hockey sticks, belly-busting laughter while creating my new name with help from my sister and mother, and more.  This will go down as one of my best birthday celebrations ever.  If you don't take at least a week, two is even better, to celebrate your birthday, I suggest giving it a try.

In fact, my last birthday wish is that all of you do something loving for yourself, something healing for yourself, something fun,  inspiring, hilarious, or a little scary, and then tell me about it. 

I've been joking that this birthday has been a re-birthing for me (although I did cancel the re-birthing breath work session I had planned); maybe it's been more of a shedding.  Along with all the fun I've been having there has been some difficult healing and surrendering.  I leave Nelson with more unknown than when I arrived.  At times it has felt like my world is falling apart and falling together almost simultaneously.  I feel anxious when I look ahead and try to figure it all out; I feel excited when I breathe into this moment and feel into it all.  The difference between the two is not subtle.

Thanks to everyone who made my visit so magical. 
So long Nelson and Kaslo and the Kootenays, for now.
Eric

"No one can possibly know what is about to happen.  It is happening each time, for the first time, for the only time."  -James Baldwin

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